“Top 5 Worst Movies Of The Year …So Far” by Blade Brown
We are officially passed the halfway mark of 2015. For the most part, it has been a stellar year full of surprises. While some may have thought the latest Terminator movie would bomb (Arnold can’t even save the franchise at this point), I don’t think anyone foreseen Jurassic World becoming the third highest grossing movie of all time! While I’d love to only talk about the good movies, unfortunately there is some crap out there that needs to be addressed. I’ve already made a list highlighting some of my favorite movies of the year, so it’s only right that I give you my opinion of the worst movies I’ve seen so far.
5. “Taken 3”
If you’re lucky enough to get a third film out of your franchise, you shouldn’t take it for granted. Toy Story 3 and The Bourne Ultimatum are two great examples of hitting a home run on the third try. Unfortunately, Luc Besson has no problem going out with a dud. This movie is easily Liam Neeson’s worst movie. Easily the worst in the series. And it’s easily one of the worst of the year. If you haven’t seen it, you’re truly blessed.
To be honest, i can’t even remember what this movie is about . The plot goes in so many different directions and the movie itself is too dumb to even care about what’s going on. If he didn’t have the incredible looking Black Mass movie coming out in September, I would’ve seriously given up on Johnny Depp after this terrible movie. All the actors involved are too talented for a crap movie like this, and they should all be ashamed of themselves to have this in their Filmography.
3. “Jupiter Ascending”
I love Mila Kunis. Like anyone else with eyes, I think she’s a beautiful woman. But after doing films like this and Oz The Great & Powerful (Not a bad movie, but she’s bad in it) I’m starting to wish she’d just voice Meg Griffin and stay off the big screen. This also leads me to believe that the Wachowskis did in fact plagiarise the author of The Matrix. Because for you to create something as classic as that, to stoop down to this level is down right sad.
Oren Peli has only directed one film prior to this. The film was the insanely successful Paranormal Activity, which sparked the whole “Found Footage” horror film craze. Since then he has produced around a dozen movies which have all mostly been financially successful. “Area 51“ is his second feature film and it pales in comparison to his debut in every way. Although the budget is bigger, the movie is down right boring. It takes entirely too long to get going, and the pay off isn’t worth the time you’ve invested in the movie. Given it’s title, I’m sure you know it involves aliens. While the first act is admittedly intriguing, it’s all downhill from there.
1. “Joe Dirt 2: Beautiful Loser“
I’ll be the first to admit, I liked the original Joe Dirt. While it was a dumb movie, it was a movie that knew it was dumb and basked in its stupidity. This movie, coming out a whopping 14 years after it’s predecessor, is just an awful movie from start to finish. I literally, LITERALLY laughed four times. The only positive thing about this movie is that Brittany Daniels (TV’s The Game, White Chicks) looks just as amazing in this movie as she did 14 years ago. And regardless of how good she looks, it doesn’t make up for this horrid pile of excrement that they dare call a feature film. Somewhere the great Chris Farley is shaking his head at how far his friend David Spade has fallen. Just like the rest of us.